Wow, day twenty seven (and I have been doing this since
MARCH - or was it February?) either way, this 31 day blog challenge has taken me much longer than 31 days. We are so close, so hopefully you aren't too sick of me yet!
Day Twenty-Seven: A Picture of you last year and now and how you have changed since then.
I had to go back through old blog posts to find a picture from last year...since all of our old photos are on our laptop. So here's the best I could do...
This is us at the St Louis Zoo back in July of 2010. It's crazy to think that was only a year ago, because so much has happened since then.
Fourth of July 2011
It's weird for me to look at these two pictures and realize that they are almost exactly a year apart from each other. A lot has happened in the past year. Relocating, loss of loved ones, life. Each experience has added to my life. Here are the ones that come to my mind...
Moving to Missouri as a family after Andy returned home from Afghanistan made me appreciate just what it means to be a family. To have a family of my own. When I was younger I never imagined it could be this wonderful.
The loss of my sweet nephew Carter made me appreciate life. It helped me to see just how precious life is. I remember when Carter passed...I laid in my bed crying. Crying for the loss, but crying mostly for my sweet brother and sister-in-law. I wrote them a letter shortly after, in it I said:
"He touched my life very
much and has caused me to reevaluate many things in my life. What a powerful influence that is, to have
such a strong spirit to touch so many people.
Sometimes I think that because we have the knowledge we do, people tend
to want to ‘slap a Band-Aid’ on our wounds and call it good. We are very blessed to have the knowledge of the
gospel, but I truly believe that grief is so important. It changes us and allows us to learn. I know
you will be able to see him again, and I look forward so much to being able to
meet him myself, and thank him. "
This is still true today. My life change because of that sweet little spirit and I can honestly say, none of us will ever be the same.
Welcoming our sweet baby Clare has also changed me. She has brought new life to my life. She allowed me to be a mother, again. Being a mother is hard. Harder than I ever imagined. It brings out the best and the worst in me. It tries my patience and exhausts me. BUT it also brings the greatest joy to my life. I can't even express how much I love these two little human beings. How different and yet how similar they are and how lucky I am to have them in my life. I hope they know I feel that way, and I hope they never question it.
Relocating to Washington allowed me to reconnect with civilization! haha. I realize just how much I love the West (as if I ever questioned it)!
Lastly, the loss of my grandfather. I love all of my grandparents. Aren't grandparents wonderful? Sure they can be a little crazy... but I am so lucky to have such wonderful grandparents. I have the fondest memories with both sides of my family...and I realize just how lucky I am to have that. I hope to create those memories for my children and to allow them to build those special relationships that can only be shared between a grandparent and a grandchild.
I think in a lot of ways I have changed for the better. I have certainly learned to appreciate my loved ones more. To value them, and every night I thank my Father in Heaven for the wonderful family that Andy and I have. I also realize that there are other ways I need to change, and maybe next year when I look back on this day - I will have improved on those things.